Ink+slingers+2011

__We are learning to paint a picture for a reader. __

__How can we make the reader visualise...__
 * By describing the actions really well.
 * Use descriptive/ precise language.
 * Write between the lines.
 * Punctuation for effect, making sure the emphasis is in the right place.
 * Metaphor.
 * Simile.
 * Alliteration and other language features.

To show and not tell...

__Tell__ Mrs Miles is funny and a little bit naughty. She stirred peanuts with her hands and offered them to Alfred. __Show__ I grinned at Rebecca, I knew she was going to do it. She slinked towards the bench, looking back to make sure no one else was watching. She dunked her hand into the peanuts, raising a handful, she released them one by one back into the bowl. She smirked, and did it again. Finally using her finger as a spoon to make a well to stir. She spotted Alfred, "would you like a peanut?" she offered, thrusting the bowl towards him.

__The three billy goats gruff __

Rhyme pattern

The little goat trotted across the bridge, the ugly troll,  came out of his fridge, to do rock and roll.

Hey you get in my belly, No I can't 'cos it is smelly, Don't eat me, 'cos I am wee.

Don't eat me, eat my brother, but please, please don't eat my mother!

__We are learning to shape our sentences and carefully choose language for effect. __

__WALT: choose language to persuade the reader. __

Emotive language is...
 * Language that pulls at your heart strings. (feel sad)
 * Words that you care about.
 * Words/ language that make feel something.

Pronoun

__We are learning to add detail and expand our ideas to enhance our arguments. __

<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">Dunedin should get all of the Christchurch Rugby World Cup games.

<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">//The DCC has spent a lot of money to build the new stadium, so we should have more games//. We should get the Christchurch games, because they have had an earthquake, and the AMI Stadium has holes and mounds of dirt on the field. The new Dunedin Stadium has got a roof and a brand new field.

<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">We are learning to use topic related vocabulary and some technical vocabulary

<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">We are learning to use <span style="background-color: #ffff00; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">precise language <span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;"> and <span style="background-color: #00ffff; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">language features <span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;"> to keep the reader interested.

<span style="color: #000080; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">What is precise language? <span style="color: #000080; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">An exact description

<span style="color: #000080; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">What are the language features? <span style="color: #000080; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">*Used short sentences (use a variety of sentences). <span style="color: #000080; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">*Used capital letters for effect. <span style="color: #000080; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">*Onomatopoeia (word that sounds like it means). <span style="color: #000080; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">*Used paragraphs. <span style="color: #000080; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">*Metaphor (A metaphor is like similie, it compares two things without using "like" or "as".

<span style="color: #000080; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">Follow up: <span style="color: #000080; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS',cursive; font-size: 160%;">Highlight the precise language you find in the rest of "The lemon tree" and use another colour to highlight the language features you find.

The Lemon Tree

Mischievous. Mischievous is probably the best word that could be used to describe Ra and I. My brother could probably think of a few others, but I tend to disagree. I have no idea where Tea was at this time, but Ra and I were outside in the backyard. Our parents should have known to keep us occupied. They should have known we would get into mischief.

Muffled voices hummed across the fence, I looked at Ra. He was gazing at the magnificent lemon tree, it had far too many lemons for any family to use and I instantly knew what he was thinking. We weren’t worried about the consequences. We never did until it was too late.

Before I knew it I was clinging onto the flimsy wooden fence, trying to keep my head down so they wouldn’t recognise me. I wasn’t particularly good at throwing a ball let alone a lemon, but there I was with a bright yellow bomb in my hands. 3, 2, 1! Ra launched the first bomb it exploded out of sight. They didn’t even notice.

It was my turn. I like think of myself as the ideas man, my ideas are magnificently mischievous, rather than the action man. My hand was shaking under the weight of the massive bomb. Finally I let it go. BAM ! The bomb exploded, it wasn’t close enough but it was still closer than Ra’s.

Our confidence was rocketing up into the sky. The yellow bombs were landing like an attack in WW2. The neighbours had noticed now. SMACK ! We got him. At this moment we both bolted into the house, we knew we were in trouble. We thought of a plan to save ourselves, we knew it would work.

A moment later we were upstairs in the lounge. “Mum, Tea was throwing lemons at the neighbours”. Poor old Tea was promptly marched next door to apologise. No one believed him when he said he didn’t do it. Success.

We thought we had succeeded and our parents would never find out the truth. We should have made a vow of silence to never speak of the lemon tree again, but we didn’t. Later on that night we were sitting in the lounge laughing about our mischief. “What should we do to Tea tomorrow?” Ra chuckled. We had thought everyone else was in bed. We were wrong. Needless to say we were in trouble, big trouble.